Sad news...

I am absolutely devestated to write that my sweet boy, Oscar, is now in Heaven.  I came home today and was trying to syringe feed him water, and he just got really floppy.  At that moment I just knew this was it. I stayed with him for a while as he took his last breaths.  I am so grateful that he wasnt alone and that God took him instead of me having to decide when to put him down. I'd been struggling so hard with that. I pray that he wasnt it pain. He seemed pretty peaceful.  I dont even have words to describe how heartbroken I am.  I dont even know how to tell the kids. They were awake when it happened but I didnt want to scare them so I let them fall asleep.  I guess we'll tell them in the morning.
Please just say a prayer for my little buddy...that he's healthy and happy now.  Oscar, my dear friend, thank you for the years of companionship. Thank you for being my girls' first pet and for putting up with the pokes and pulls, and thank you for being my only friend when times were difficult. We love you so so much and will miss you!!!

exhausted...and looking for advice

I dont know that anyone actually reads this, but just in case theres someone who does...I need advice!! My little peanut (2years) has started waking in the middle of the night, screaming, for no apparent reason. Well, maybe the reason is she wants to hang out with me b/c she's happy as a clam when I walk in her room.  She makes silly requests..."mama, more water" (as she's holding the full cup in her hand), "mama, leave my door open" (well, its against the wall...it doesnt get any more open than that!) and so on and so forth until two hours have gone by and I'm exhausted.  If I could understand the "why" to why she's doing this, maybe I could fix it.  We're going on three weeks of up all nights, and I'm tired. Like, having a newborn tired.  So, if theres anyone out there that may have advice, any advice, please lay it on me because this mama needs some sleep!!

Also, if you wouldnt mind throwing a prayer our way...my little buddy Oscar is not doing as well as I had hoped.  I mentioned him in a previous post and we thought he was getting better.  He's hardly able to move, and its scaring me.  One of my girls finds comfort knowing that he'll be in Heaven soon with our family and friends, but my littles don't understand why he can't stay with us.  I'm just praying he starts to feel good again and makes it a little longer. I dont want him to be in pain, but it is HARD for me to let go. I'm praying for guidance on this because I just dont know what to do. 

Adopt already!!

When people find out what I do for a living, the MOST common response is, "I've always wanted to adopt but...." and then they give me all these reasons why they can't. Not enough money (fair enough), a spouse who isn't on board, an inability to decide where to adopt from...so more often than not, people just don't do it. I find that just heartbreaking. The millions of orphans that need a home, and deserve a family, and we're too lazy, too confused, too stingy to move forward. 
Last night I showed my husband pictures from the blog of one of "my" families who is in China adopting.  I've tried in the past to connect him to the faces of children I see online with no luck. But, as he saw the mother and her new daughter through the various photos...I started to see him soften.  He asked questions, he didnt roll his eyes as I gave him statistics or explained the dire situations these children face if a family isnt found.

Trust me people, this is a big deal.

For as long as we've been together, he's known I do "adoption stuff," but hasnt been invested much in it. I'm hoping that his heart will open more to the idea of us adopting ourselves.  I pray that he'll be on board someday.  If not, I pray that he supports me as I attempt to raise money for other families. I could never bring a child into our home that he was hesitant to love like our own. I couldn't do that to an innocent child, but I'm really really hoping he gets there.

You can follow the family's journey here.

In the meantime, some pictures of our littles. We are BLESSED. 

This was my peanut at her daddy's swim meet the other night. She was not thrilled about the camera in her face.  :) 

 

Below are the pics from today that I took while the girls were playing with every water toy we own.  Poor peanut...her nose was running all day and I don't think I got a single shot where she doesnt have boogies running down her face.  They must have played hard b/c the littles have been napping for over two hours!  

Sweetness

Thankful!!

This may seem silly to some, but today I got some good news about my cat. He's not just any cat...he's my first "baby" and my daughters' first pet. They ADORE him. He'd had a total ear ablation (Sp?) surgery in April where the vet removed his entire ear canal and a large aggressive tumor. Shortly after, he stopped eating, lost 15 pounds (which was more than half his weight), and developed tumor-like lumps on his neck. I thought this was it...we spent our time loving on him and trying to make him just feel good. WELL. The first vet who diagnosed him with lymphoma may have been wrong!  Our local vet tested him and believes its just severe infection and he's not. going. to. die.
THANKFUL!!!! 
Clearly he is not happy in these pictures!  He HATES that cone head thing, but it was a must b/c his ear canal had been removed.  You'll be happy to know that his actual ear healed up just fine and he looks "normal."

On the adoption front, please take a look at this blog. This is a family that I've been fortunate enough to work with through my adoption agency. They are inspirational!!  Seriously, they are not like any family I've ever met before. The mother is currently in China picking up her 13 year old daughter, and they had just adopted from China this past December...oh, and they have four biological kids...and they're getting another daughter this fall!  If you feel so inclined, you can donate to their adoption fund as well.  Adoption is extremely expensive, but theres so many children who need...DESERVE...a family to call their own. 

Trying again to get this right!

Hopefully the third time is a charm and I can figure out this picture thing. I'm just feeling particularly stubborn today and I'm going to keep messing with it until I get it straight! 

This is my oldest blessing. She is so creative...I dont have as much creativity in my entire body as she does in her pinky finger!  She creates things as realistically as possible and is just super talented.  Yeah, I'm a little proud! 

This is my middle sweetheart!  She is FULL of life (and quite often full of herself lol!) She always makes us laugh, even when we shouldnt!  She has the most stunning brown eyes and I swear she's a genius :) 

And another picture of Peanut...Happily sitting on the potty with a sucker. 

VICTORY!!!

So, I started a new job today, which makes my total FOUR jobs.  Honestly, I feel like walking away from all of it. I'm SO wore out!! But, the experience is good, and it'll fill the gap where my hours got cut from my primary postion. Sigh....

In case you were wondering what I sell in my etsy shop (which I doubt you were b/c I dont think I've ever mentioned it before!)... I make monogrammed and personalized items. I have a bunch of stuff from dresses to birthday shirts, to adoption t-shirts. Here's a sample of what I've got going on, and if you're interested, email me, convo me, whatever, and I'd be happy to set up a custom

listing for you! My hope is that in the near future I can sell these adoption shirts as a fundraiser for the non-profit I'm starting up. I know its just a drop in the bucket, but its a start!!

What can YOU do??

So I follow the blog of a mom/wife/CEO and generally awesome person.  She is a total kick-a$$ advocate for adoption and is full of great ideas. Check out her most recent post, and if you're nearby DC, VA, MD...maybe YOU could join the march too?  I'm going to try and make it, if I can find someone to watch the littles. I might take my oldest...she's old enough to understand the gist of this problem and also old enough to take a stand of her own. 
Take a quick peek at her blog if you will!
Lori Printy's blog

Post 2

So I'm slowly figuring out how to piece this all together. I've been thinking so much about the adoption stuff, but its had to take a backseat to real life for a bit. 
See, I'm a social worker and my hours have just been cut. I was grant funded but the money ran out...my darling and absolutely adorable director (really, she's so cute...looks just like Betty Boop with curly hair!)has been able to find some money to keep me on, but not enough for it to be full time. This means I'm now carrying a caseload, writing another grant, and recruiting foster parents...all in under 20 hours per week. Sigh. I'm reminding myself to be grateful that I even have a job.
Ok, so that said, I promised pictures and I'm going to try and deliver!!

This is Peanut. She's my youngest...2 years old...and an absolute JOY.  She is so very funny and speaks like she's a little teeny 50 year old. We're in the throes of potty training and boy is she proud of herself for sitting...and sitting...and sitting on that potty.  She doesnt ever do anything, just sits upon her little pint-sized throne and waits.  I'm blessed...she is awesome!!

Tomorrow I'll post more pics of the other kids...for some reason I can post just one right now. Obviously there is more I need to figure out!